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While your exact identity, I've seen clues all over town. Like the little correction marks on bathroom stalls. (I'll admit to overstaying my welcome in said stalls.) Those little circles and hatch marks got me so excited that I just sat there and drooled while other patrons pounded the door. You're right. That IS the wrong 'your'. Mmmmmmm....bliss.

Sometime soon I want to meet you in person. I'll bring my red pen and we can print out Missed Connections and giggle about how incredibly stupid everyone is. Then maybe later we can circle the freckles and blemishes on our bodies - the mistakes which make us ugly. Be sure to get the sizable freckle near my left ear. If that was an English paper, I would never even pass Freshman Comp. And the scar on my leg is the equivalent of using a preposition at the end of a sentence. Fucking gross! I hope you can fix me. Do they make White Out in flesh tones?

You and I both know proper grammar is the most important factor in someone's attractiveness. With a little work we can go together like Robert Frost and an illiterate's haiku. Baby, we were meant for each other.

Please thoroughly correct this post and send it back to me so I know it's really you.

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